Why I love labels; How we transcend them ~ after they helped us live more authentically.

Why Self-Identity? Why Labels? Why transcend them?

“Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn’t you – all of the expectations, all of the beliefs – and becoming who you are.”
– Rachel Naomi Remen

I have always loved labels, yet never knew why until I began to immerse myself in learning, understanding, and practicing my two favorite, helpful personality assessment tools: the Myers Briggs Personality Assessment, and The Enneagram.

By overlaying my 26 years of exclusive work with HSPs, I have come to understand the many differences and similarities we all share as HSPs, but also as individuals. I understand how family of origin, work environments, geographic areas, culture, and varied life experiences can influence, hinder or block our quest for self identity and knowledge.

Part of my background in  cultural diversity has always led to a keen interest in wanting to understand how stereotypes, oppression, tensions, and misunderstandings can create undeserved wounds.  These  internalized wounds can often be attributed to a lack of knowledge about one’s own culture, family of origin or genetic temperaments. These same  stereotypes, tensions or hurt feelings can also be caused by holding too tightly to a predetermined sense of self, or by judging or resenting differences instead of understanding or honoring them.  

Understanding labels can be helpful to better understand challenges and obstacles an individual may contend with.  Many labels have been unfairly assigned to others, and a way to counteract this bias is to  take personal responsibility for self-knowledge by utilizing various personality assessments and temperament research.  Greater self-knowledge  hopefully creates not only self-compassion but compassion for others as well.   

I have been certified in the Myers Briggs Personality Assessment since 1991 so obviously I am a bit biased about the usefulness of this assessment.  I have an extensive background in the Enneagram as well, and find both of these assessments helpful and empowering, offering therapeutic insights that support growth and development. 

Imagine Yourself in the middle of a large lake or ocean

Imagine yourself stranded in the middle of a very large lake, or ocean, treading water to stay alive.  You have no life jacket, no swim fins, no water, food or sunscreen.  Even if you are a good swimmer, without a reliable or known way to shore you will eventually grow tired, very tired, because day after treading / dreading day, you realize you are going nowhere.    (We’ve all been there at some time or another.) 
 Real life experiences of this treading water metaphor  would be recognizing places where you feel misunderstood, judged, or when you are in unpleasant, draining or exhausting environments.  You realize how easily it is to become frustrated or bored, and over time, you become aware of a growing sense of dread, anxiety, depression or even  fear.  It can become hard to feel hopeful as you struggle to find your way to shore, or find you way back to  some familiar sense of self.  In ‘real life’ this is often similar to being on an ” endless coping wheel of life.” 

Now Imagine being thrown a life jacket

Perhaps your first life support is a life jacket or “label”  associated with the  Myers Briggs.  Suddenly,  you begin to understand your own cognitive processing based on thinking, feeling and perceiving.  Ahhh…. a step closer to a shore. 
    Then one day, you are given fins or a “label” we  call “the Enneagram.”  With this support, you begin to understand underlying fears, motivations, and desires that unconsciously drive your  actions and behaviors.  Ahh.. another step closer to finding a shore you can thrive on. 
  Finally, you are given a compass, called Sensory Processing Sensitivity, or a ‘label’ of highly sensitive person.    This compass, added to the other “life supports” offer you a trusted way  to reach a shore — one that will allow you to rest, recover, and one which will allow you to start ‘focusing on needs, not approval’ and one that will expect you to “trust your own process” always asking “What is there for me to learn in this moment, and perhaps, most importantly, “What do I need in this moment?”
Finding your way to this new shore, you can enjoy envisioning a different way of living, a different way of being… and you realize you can discover and start to make even the slightest change.  toward a more authentic way of living and being. 
 Or maybe your “label” is a diagnosis, or a mental health condition.  It doesn’t matter the ‘label,’ what matters is that you have been given information to servie as a guide to begin to find a way to your shore, to start a process of meeting your unique needs.  With enough small shifts, you begin to realize you are being called to put down roots. The seeds  of your self-identity have been claimed and planted with care.  With sensitive attunement, attention nurturing and and love, provided by you —  these seeds can begin to grow and bloom.  It is almost as if you can sense and feel their roots growing deep and their unique foliage beginning to bloom and reach for the light …

Imagine these seeds producing deep roots
Imagine the seeds growing deep into the Earth as they become strong roots. These will be roots that you trust; roots that you depend on for comfort, or when the wind starts to threaten your stability or well-being.   Your unique foliage will start to offer its unique beauty to those around you ~~ and you will hopefully be more confident to “Let your own light shine” and share your true gifts with others.

Transcending our Labels
You can now relax, while learning to allow your DOING to be inspired by your BEING. There is no need for labels now…as you have slowly transcended them without even realizing it. Yet, you do realize your labels have served you well, they have been your friends, and you will always be grateful for what they have shared.